beauty from pain

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thehopemovement:

Today marks the 12th anniversary of the Columbine High School Massacre. 

On April 20, 1999, in the small, suburban town of Littleton, Colorado, two high-school seniors, Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris, enacted an all-out assault on Columbine High School during the middle of the school day. The boys’ plan was to kill hundreds of their peers. With guns, knives, and a multitude of bombs, the two boys walked the hallways and killed. When the day was done, twelve students, one teacher, and the two murderers were dead. 

Remember the victims and survivors.

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So you gonna take 15 minutes huh? I’ll take 17

(via fearless-intention)

favorite part

(via the-nomnomnom-monster)

(via the-nomnomnom-monster)

(via the-nomnomnom-monster)

but i push myself. pausing to cry or to think of how i could possibly explain what is going to happen to me. but still i push forward. because i can’t just leave. with no explanation, no goodbyes. i won’t let that happen. i will tell those people who meant the most who they were to me. and how much i love them. though when its all done i’m even those letters won’t comfort them. the pain they will feel will be incredible. and i will be the cause of it. how selfish it is. for me to do this to them. all they ever did was love me and try to help. but is it fair for me to be miserable and alive, as long as they are happy? no. its not. its selfish for them not to let me go….no, i can’t believe that. i’m just saying that to try to make what i’m about to do, okay. but its not. its wrong, and supid and, selfish and hurtful, and someone should stop me. before it happens. but again will i? will i really? these letters are like insurance, just in case i really to kill myself. those whom i love will have something to cling to, to have a little more comprehension of my actions. so, these letters doesn’t mean i’m going to. its just in case…. right?

or to be more specific. people feel depressed. i’ve been fighting depression for many years. and their are ups and downs. suicide is somthing people think of when you say the word ‘depression’. ive thought about it before, and ive even thought of how i would do it. but i refuse to believe that when it came to it, i would actually kill myself. i would never want to hurt my friends and family like that. and i don’t want to die. i just wish sometimes life would stop. i could walk around the world like time was frozen. but i would always be able to press play again. and life would always keep going. but death. that would mean the end. no more of anything. and suicide is a sin. wouldn’t i go to hell? i don’t want that. i want to spend eternity with my king. but, maybe, if i was feeling extremely down. and the pills or knife were right there. would i? could i? idk anymore…..